At the beginning of KLRC’s month of gratitude I had to ask myself a few important, yet difficult, questions. I asked myself how I measured gratitude in my life, what I was most grateful for, and how frequently I took time out of my day to recognize the blessings I’ve received. Upon doing these things I realized I was taking for granted the most important things to me, things I don’t think I’d be myself without. I quickly realized that I needed to measure my gratitude by taking a step back, and looking at the bigger picture, rather than daily toils or struggles. An anonymous quote I used to help guide me upon my personal journey toward increased gratitude in my life is this:
“Remember when you so badly wanted what you currently have?”
I know what you’re thinking, this quote doesn’t seem all that exciting, at first glance it looks like one of quotes you’d see on Pinterest or printed across a trendy coffee mug. But if you really think about the message behind it, you can better understand how it changed my outlook on how I feel gratitude.
I remember being in high school and falling in love with a boy. His name was Connor, he wore funny sandals, had fluffy (yet voluminous) curls and couldn’t dance to save his life. We dated for four years and I remember constantly praying that he’d be the one, and that I could spend the rest of my life with him. At that time, I wanted God to answer that prayer and show me that Connor was the person he intended for me to be with. Today Connor is my husband. I took a step back and had to remind myself that Connor is not the fact that he doesn’t know how a hamper works, a leftover thief, or an expert procrastinator. He is one of the biggest blessings in my life, an answered prayer, and something that I now have that I wanted so badly before.
I took on this same mentality and thought about different things, things that at one point in my life I poured my heart into, I prayed to God about. Things like getting into college -- the hours spent filling out applications, writing essays, taking ACT’s, or applying for scholarships. I shouldn’t be any less grateful today to be a college student than I was the day I opened my acceptance letter. Things like buying a house. I remember applying for loans, househunting, and praying to God that we could move home by our families. Today I’m writing this blog post from my home, a house sitting by both of our parents and siblings, that I’ve lived in for a year. I shouldn’t be any less grateful than I was the day I signed the closing papers.
Today, my prayer is this: I pray that I can continue walking through my life with the same level of gratitude in my heart as I did when I lacked the things I so desperately yearned for. And I pray that those reading this can do the same.
I will give thanks to you, Lord, with all my heart; I will tell of all your wonderful deeds.
Psalm 9:1
Alexus Underwood
KLRC Summer Intern