Epilepsy, Resurging Faith, Personal Trauma

In September I made a rededication of my life to the Lord and I have been able to lay more of my life down to Jesus and give Him more control. However, I am still mentally fighting a lot and even by myself, I believe I am under attack because I am reaching out to Jesus for help and Satan doesn't want that to happen because I am realizing my personal worth because I am seeing more of the joy in the world that God has provided. My heart is more open and loving and slowly learning more and more about the Word as I read. I believe that I have been afflicted with painful headaches, restless sleep, anxiousness, and I think I am seizing in my sleep. I developed epilepsy and God used it to get me out of the Army before it's recent politicization and wokeness. Though, I would like the anxiety, headaches, and seizures to go away for good because I serve the God of impossible possibilities so I ask that people see this and be encouraged and pray for me to be healed like the convulsing boy in Matthew 17. Also, I am personally healing after experiencing psychological and mental abuse by my father and stepmom. I want to be able to forgive fully and move on and learn to honor him still even though it hurts. I want to see Jesus even in times of desperation and know that He is with me in the moment even though I have read Scripture but the moment paralyzes my spirit and I want want to be a Thomas rather than Job. I want to follow Jesus blindly now and just go where He goes and defend Him vigorously and with love and grace for those around me. I do not want to desire anything except His presence and to fully fill me everyday because I realize now that I have a true desire to love others but I need to be made whole first and equipped and then be made ready to go into the world to preach the gospel, bridge the gap, and be an example so they can see Jesus in me. Please pray for me in these things.