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If I were a silent voice inside your head right now helping you to build healthy relationships, you might hear me say, “Generally speaking, what is said is never what is heard.”

More times than not, we assume the worst, and then we start acting out what we think we heard. It’s like we instantly become mind-readers or something. And then we’re mad at our spouse, a friend, or a colleague, and they might not even know anything is wrong! Why? Because no one stopped to clarify, or even ask the question, “Did you mean that? Because I heard this.”

At the end of a very long, exhausting day of feeling hurt, angry, bitter, and resentful, we find out we were the ones who were wrong. When we do finally ask, we might hear back, “That’s not what I meant at all! This is my heart, this is what I said, and I’m so glad you asked instead of continuing to assume the worst.”

It’s exhausting to try to read minds, to assume the worst, and to brood all day. It’s so much easier to stop and clarify the moment something even sounds funny, something doesn’t sit well with us, or something sounds out of character from the one delivering the message.

God is a God of order, not confusion. Seek order today. When in question, stop and clarify. Don’t give the enemy any room to wiggle in your life.